Happy Halloween! I can't say that I really like this holiday – not much into the dark and morbid, and really not into “scary”. But it is fun to see everyone's creative costumes and Halloween will forever be a reminder for me of my battle – with each one almost guaranteed to be better than 2009 when I was in the hospital. Things seem to still be moving right along, with the overall trend being a positive one. Last week's labs were a little lower than they had been, but those things seem to change so quickly that I have a hard time getting excited about them. If they're even lower tomorrow, I might start to wonder.
Here's my latest pondering - “lukewarmness” (not a word, I realize). It's a topic that seems to have come up a lot lately – in my small group, devotional, the Leaven. To some degree, even in the political ads that have plagued the media. Is it inevitable, are we all guilty? Whether you're talking about work or relationships or faith, approaching it half-hearted isn't very productive. No one wants to have the guy that only kind-of tries on his team. And you really don't want to work with the guy that thinks he's “all that” when in reality he doesn't work much and doesn't seem to care about the common goal. I know how frustrating it is to be on the receiving end of this attitude, yet it doesn't stop me from doing it to God. I'm glad He doesn't toss us off the team when we over-value our contribution or fail to even acknowledge the playbook. He patiently waits on us to look His direction and get over our own pride – always happy to see us and pleased with our genuine yet flawed attempts to know and fulfill His will. I've decided being lukewarm is inevitable. Sure, there are periods when we're more “sold out” for God, but there are also going to be times when we hardly even take the time to say “hello”. I think the important thing is to know what we're fighting for. Acknowledging the never-failing love and mercy of God, while at the same time realizing our own failings. We're just a blip in the grand scheme, yet God welcomes us to participate in His plan. That's enough to keep me struggling to discover my role.
God never stops calling us, “ … show me your face, let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet and your face is lovely.” ~ Song of Solomon 2:14
