Merry Christmas 2011!

Merry Christmas! (a couple days late). The past week has flown by in Kansas City – each day after work, I'd head to Mom and Dad's for dinner and to hang out with the family. So it's been very full days of family, food and lots of games! Keith is still in town for another couple days so the fun continues - at least a little longer! I'm so grateful that I've been feeling well through the holidays- not sure that I was able to keep up with the kids, but did ok :). My energy has been pretty good, my stomach continues to hang in there and no emergency trips to Omaha this year! How much difference a year can make!
I never feel like I'm really ready for Christmas and am always sad when it's over. I spend advent trying to get mentally prepared, pondering the meaning of the season, striving to get excited for Christmas and yet I never feel like I'm as “excited and happy” as I should be. Then it's over and I feel like I've missed something. It's like I can't wrap my brain around what we're celebrating because if I could, I'd be ecstatic. Even after all that's happened the past 2 years, I still struggle to really appreciate the birthday of the savior of the world. Why is that? Maybe it's the busyness of our days or the crowds at the mall – the devil has done a great job of distracting us from what December 25th stands for. I've probably heard this verse from Luke 100 times, but for some reason I never “heard” the symbolism until this year or thought that it in any way related to me - “but there was no room for them in the inn” - Would there be room in the inn today? I know that God still has a purpose for me, and when he knocks, I pray that I do not turn him away because “there's no room" for him. So, even though another Christmas has come and gone, I will continue to seek so that I can “see the star and rejoice”.

Pretty much the same...

Kind-of a dreary day all the way around. Most of the trip to Omaha was either overcast or raining, (but thankfully it wasn't freezing). Once we got there things went rather smoothly. As I suspected, not much has changed since November. Blood work is stable and chest Xray looks the same. The amount of air that I can move out of my lungs changed very little – from 49% to 51%. :( That translates to feeling fine doing day to day things but getting winded with any exertion. Dr Vose reminded me that we should be happy that the condition of my lungs hasn't deteriorated and has shown positive, albeit small, improvement. However, all I can think about is that the reality is that they might never get better and I'm still not ready to come to terms with that. At this point there's not much we can do but wait and pray. I will strive to keep positive and not allow myself to dwell on what I can't do but remind myself of all that I can and have faith in God's healing. And the way it looks now, I should actually be able to enjoy Christmas, New Year and my birthday at home this year!

“I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from her to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” ~Matthew 17:20-21

Day by Day

It's been a good couple weeks! I've had good energy, my stomach seems to be behaving for the most part, I'm able to work and finding time to play! This weekend I was able to get in some country dancing for the first time in a long time – it was great fun and thankfully my feet remembered what to do. Unfortunately, it was a painful reminder that my lungs still have a long way to go as I had to rest after each song. I guess we'll find out exactly where they are on Wednesday when I go back to Omaha for my monthly check. We're praying for greater than 48% functionality!